


On Your Mind

by AtinyBitofaMess



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Confessions, Cute, Feelings Realization, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Love, M/M, Marijuana, Recreational Drug Use, Requested, Soft Choi Jongho, Soft Song Mingi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:07:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24786667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AtinyBitofaMess/pseuds/AtinyBitofaMess
Summary: Mingi and Jongho discover they maybe care a little bit more about each other than they originally thought.
Relationships: Choi Jongho/Song Mingi
Comments: 6
Kudos: 54





	On Your Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This was requested by a friend. Not much else to say other than I'm not hugely confident about this one, but I hope you all enjoy my first Jong/Gi story. 💖
> 
> UPDATE- at some point I will go through and fix the missing italics and errors. When that will be, who knows. Until then please enjoy :D  
> -K

Mingi was filming for the group's next logbook, chatting away with Yunho. He was in the middle of saying he showed up at the chorus of their performance of wonderland when Jongho popped up, seemingly out of nowhere, grabbing his cheeks in his hand.  
"Oh, did you?~" He joked before walking off.  
Flustered, Mingi said to the camera, "What should I do with my face? I looked so bad, right? Can you edit it?"  
In an instant Jongho came back, poking at Mingi's stomach.  
"Did you? Did you?~"  
He squished Mingi's cheeks with his long fingers once more, making a face like he was talking to a puppy.  
"Our cute Mingi, did you?~" Jongho spoke in a patronizing tone before making his exit.  
"Yes, thank you Jongho-yah." Mingi responded, slightly dumbfounded and trying to keep his cool. Thinking he was in the clear, he ignored the fluttering in his chest and continued his conversation with Yunho. Jongho came back to squish his cheeks yet again, and for some reason Mingi's heart did a backflip this time.  
Jongho's puckered plush lips and borderline aegyo tone of voice made him see the younger in a softer light.  
"Aigoo!" Jongho sounded, before repeating "Did you?~" for what felt like the umpteenth time. Mingi saw Jongho as something almost… cute. Even though the boy was clearly playing around with him.  
"I love you, thank you." Mingi kept his composure as he spoke, effectively hiding the fact that his heart was soaring in a way he'd only felt once before.

That's when he realized he maybe, possibly, felt a little more for their maknae than just friendship. 

\------

Mingi had had…. Interesting? feelings towards Jongho previously. It was near midnight on the ride back from their last concert of the first world tour. Mingi had fallen asleep, and awoke to find Jongho sleeping while leaning against his shoulder. The back of the van fit three people side by side, so he'd figured it was coincidence that someone was leaning on him, since he was seated in the middle. San had slept on his shoulder many times before, but it never so much as phased him. Same with Yunho.  
However, this was the first time Jongho had used his shoulder as a pillow, and something startled inside him when he realized it was indeed the maknae. The surprise was like a jolt of electricity through his body, kicking his heart into overdrive. He tilted his head at an awkward angle to peek at the boy, wondering why he felt compelled to do so. He was met with plump, pouty lips, a cheek squished against his somewhat bony shoulder.  
_Oh shit, he’s adorable. _Mingi swallowed hard as if it might vanquish the thought.  
Seeing Jongho appear vulnerable hit different from the usual ‘don’t fuck with me, I’ll kick your ass’ vibe he normally gave off. Mingi found himself smiling as he let his body relax into the seat.  
A few minutes later the van went over a significant bump while driving through a construction zone, causing the manager to curse and apologize to the members. It also caused Jongho’s head to bounce off Mingi’s shoulder and hang limp in what looked like an extremely uncomfortable position. For whatever reason, Mingi felt compelled to take the younger’s head in his palm, and lay it against his chest; a softer place than his shoulder. His tired mind made him bold despite the nerves pounding in his ribcage. He gently pet Jongho’s hair, pausing only for a moment to admire the younger's uncharacteristically defenseless expression. He pulled his hand back when Jongho mumbled “Hyung, your heart is racing.” He dared not move for the rest of the ride.  
When they got back to the hotel that night, Jongho didn’t seem the least bit bothered by waking up leaning against Mingi. He grinned, patting the older’s head before exiting the van. In the hotel room, Mingi headed straight for the shower to avoid any awkward confrontation or scolding from the maknae.  
Jongho acted as if nothing happened when he went to shower later, leaving Mingi to think about the whole situation, his brain making a bigger deal out of it than it needed to.  
The next day, before heading to the airport to fly back to Korea, Jongho continued acting like he didn’t know what had happened, sitting next to Mingi again in the van. By choice. Maybe he didn’t remember. He hoped he didn't.  
Whatever the case, Mingi thought he was home free when he settled into his aisle seat on the plane, a small lane of space between the two rows. Yet he couldn’t help thinking of the way his heart reacted to the younger; some feeling he didn't know how to place. That was the first time Mingi realized he might enjoy more of Jongho’s company. Intimate company, but he quickly pushed the thought away and ate his in-flight ramyun. __

____

____

——

Two months after the logbook incident, Mingi found a rare braveness in his still-half-asleep blood. It was morning, and he was in charge of waking members for practice that day. He started with his roommate Jongho, easily leaning over the top bunk with a quiet voice. "Jongho-yah, it's time to wake up."  
The younger stirred under his covers, determined to stay there.  
"Babe." Mingi cood again, causing the younger to sit upright almost instantly.  
"Wha- who?" He looked around before his eyes landed on Mingi. "Oh." his voice fell to a whisper. "Y-yeah. Good morning Mingi hyung."  
Mingi showed a wide smile as he wiped his thumb over the dried sleep tears on the younger's cheek. He lingered there, pink flush blooming beneath his finger.  
"C'mon, Jjong, Seonghwa's making breakfast. Pancakes." He continued. Jongho didn't respond, his hand slowly reaching up to grasp Mingi's as if to remove it, the older watching him intently. It was unexpectedly gentle, his fingers curling around Mingi's hand, and the older felt a zing of heat run through his body.  
He shied away, turning and bounding out of the room as he called behind himself "Don't be late!"  
He rushed to the bathroom, splashing cold water over his face as he reminded himself that Jongho was a group member. That he shouldn't, wouldn't, pine after him. He was just tired. Yeah. It was the sleep making him act so bold and so against himself. 

Later he would realize he was only acting more himself than ever. 

\------

On an insignificant weekend of relaxation, Mingi asked Jongho to practice with him. Nothing in particular was scheduled so it seemed out of the blue that the older would ask him to practice specifically to improve his footwork. Ever the eager student, Jongho complied, and went with him to the KQ building.  
Mingi played songs that they'd cover danced to before and mostly went over old routines they'd likely never perform again. When Back to Sleep came on, Mingi pulled Jongho close by his shirt collar. He executed a few body rolls before Jongho could even recognize what was happening when he was being pushed back. He stumbled just barely, watching Mingi roll his body once again before he took to the floor, kneeling as he rolled his hips. He watched the other turn over and lift himself in one fluid motion, mesmerized.  
"Remember?" Mingi asked, borderline panting after all the dancing they'd done.  
"I- you'll… I think you'll have to show me again." Jongho squeaked.  
"Fine." Mingi said matter-of-factly, walking up to Jongho and yanking him close by his collar once more. The maknae let himself be pulled, pursing his lips when Mingi lingered in the proximity a bit too long. After maybe 15 seconds Mingi let go, his eyes giving Jongho a once-over before he spouted "Actually, uhm, nevermind. We're done for today." and promptly left the room to go shower.  
Jongho didn't know what it meant to feel your heart "leap" but he thinks that would have accurately described the weird sensation he felt when Mingi was inches from his face, looking him dead in the eye like a shark might his prey. 

\------

Next week, during a trip to LA for the filming of an online variety show, Mingi found himself stoned out of his mind with the rest of the members. They had all shared a fat joint, gifted to them by a dance instructor in honor of '4/20', a made up holiday during which Americans who smoke weed partake in consuming copious amounts of the plant, inhaled or otherwise. Having never smoked before, the whole group was high off their asses. Snacks were strewn about the coffee table of their rented house in various stages of being devoured.  
Hongjoong and Seonghwa were watching some absurd Adult Swim show on his laptop, laughing around mouthfuls of smartfood popcorn. Yunho was having a somewhat serious SmashBro's tournament with Yeosang, who lost every time and thought it to be the funniest thing in history. Wooyoung and San laid on the carpet side by side, talking about the universe and pointing at the ceiling as if there were constellations on the aged white paint.  
Mingi was stretched out on the couch letting his thoughts drift maybe a little too far, given he was thinking of Jongho. Again. Recently the younger seemed to be popping into his head whenever he let his mind wander. Even in his floaty state of stoned, he felt conflicted by it. Jongho accepted his skinship easily when he normally despised it coming from other members. He sometimes acted flustered by it, but surely it was just that. Just an act, right? Those times he'd flirted subtly or otherwise with the youngest… was he.. did he like Jongho? Why had he even felt the desire to flirt with him like that? It was supposed to be a joke, right? But it's no joke to play with others' feelings. It was almost like he was testing himself subconsciously when he flirted. Yet he'd felt so compelled to do so. To be… closer to him. Why? And why did Jongho act as if nothing happened afterwards?  
Mingi continued to silently stew in his thoughts, unaware of his now quickened breathing.

The boy plaguing Mingi's mind was seated on the floor in front of the couch, leaning back against it as he played a game of scrabble on his phone. Jongho paused his game and stood up to use the restroom. 

While washing his hands he got caught up in staring at himself in the mirror and inspecting eyes, wondering exactly how many lashes each had. A knock on the door returned him to reality.  
"Jongho, dude, are you dead? I need to pee sooo bad." San's voice came out slow and exaggerated.  
"Don't piss yourself, I'll be right out." Jongho shut off the water and creaked open the door, San rushing around him to relieve his bladder.  
It felt like the long hallway stretched on forever as he made his way to the end of it, but when he finally did, he saw Wooyoung knelt by the side of the couch holding Mingi's hand. He was rubbing soothing circles into the red haired boy's palm. For a moment Jongho felt something ugly and new -jealousy?- bubble in his gut. Then he noticed Mingi was sweating, chest heaving with eyes shut tight. Without thinking he knelt beside Wooyoung, his high seemingly forgotten as worry adrenaline flowed through him.  
"Is he okay?" Jongho looked frantically towards Wooyoung then back at the distressed boy. "Mingi hyung, are you alright?" Jongho questioned, brushing Mingi's slightly damp bangs away from his forehead. His eyes opened, glancing at the younger. There was something in them, something asking him to-  
"He'll be fine, he's just having a panic attack. I'm trying to help calm him but everyone's a little different and the techniques I use for mine aren't doing much."  
"Woo hyung, get him some water."  
Jongho instructed, taking his place as he got up to run to the kitchen. He took Mingi's hand and squeezed tight, placing his free hand over his heart to find it beating rapidly beneath his palm.  
"Jongho," Mingi said breathlessly. "I'm… tingly. S-scared…"  
Jongho knew exactly what that felt like, having dealt with his own anxiety as a trainee. Mingi hadn't experienced a panic attack before, and the first one is always the scariest. He moved his hand up to hold Mingi's cheek, to bring the sensation of touch elsewhere in attempts to ground the older. His thumb grazed over Mingi's lips, dry yet still plush.  
"Breathe with me, hyung. In through the nose, out through the mouth." Jongho demonstrated his suggestion, guiding Mingi through the deep breathing when Wooyoung returned with water. He set the water down, watching Mingi finally calm a bit with Jongho by his side.  
Wooyoung didn't say anything, but must've ushered everyone else out of the room because it had grown silent aside from the slow, measured breaths Mingi took. He appeared to have relaxed almost back to normal, sitting up to take sips of the water while still clutching Jongho's hand like his life depended on it.  
"Hyung, you feeling a bit better?"  
Mingi just looked down at the younger where he knelt on the floor, meeting his eyes with a nod. Before he knew it Mingi's arms wrapped around him, pulling him into a tight hug. The angle was awkward and uncomfortable, and Jongho hesitated for a moment before wrapping his arms around the older. With his face buried in Mingi's sweater he could smell the scent of his cologne. Somehow it was all he could think of in that moment, until he heard the older's deep voice.  
"Thank you, Jongho-yah." Mingi whispered into his hair. "So much." His grip tightened on the Maknae, almost restricting but it felt so… right.

In that moment, Jongho realized he liked Mingi (a lot), and Mingi realized he needed to tell Jongho about his own feelings. 

\-------

The next day, Mingi tossed his arm around Jongho's shoulder and tugged him to his side. "Look at Hongjoong! This is the third grand prix he's lost and he's still confident he can win." Mingi laughed full-bellied, stilling when Jongho leaned his head on his shoulder. It felt familiar. It felt… nice. He didn't overthink it. He just let it happen, hand idly rubbing Jongho's arm, who took comfort in the touch.  
"He's gonna lose again. He's totally gonna lose." Jongho informed, as Hongjoong got hit by a green shell and fell back into 6th place.  
"Against Yunho? Of course. I'm pretty sure we all would."  
"What about me?" Jongho piped, attempting his best puppy eyes as he lifted his head to look up at the older.  
"Yea, you'd lose too. But maybe he'd fool around with you just for looking so cute." Mingi said, instantly realizing how awful he sounded saying such a thing and hoping nobody else heard. Thankfully, it appeared the other members were none the wiser.  
"Nah, he may be my type physically but not exactly in personality." Jongho said casually, reaching up to ruffle the tall boy's hair.  
Mingi's throat ran dry. There was a pause as he debated whether or not he should say what was on his mind. Throwing caution the the wind, he blurted "Maybe you should lose against me then." Seconds later, after no reaction, he mentally slapped himself in the face. No. No, you fucking idiot. NO. Too forward!  
Unphased and confident, Jongho gave Mingi a serious look. "You know, you've been flirting with me a lot, Hyung. You've been extra handsy lately, too. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. Just… it can be more than flirting. If… You want..." he trailed off, confidence lost and ears turning red.  
Mingi's face went hot and he swallowed hard.  
"Y-you, uh.."  
"C'mon Hyung." Jongho stood and made his way to one of the shared rooms. Mingi followed behind wordlessly, nervousness thumping through his veins.  
When he entered, Jongho was already laying on the bed. He smacked the spot next to him a few times until Mingi moved to lay there on his side, facing the younger. They stayed like that for a few minutes, looking each other over, Jongho being the one to eventually break the silence.  
"Mingi Hyung, I like you. Like you like you. I'm assuming from how you've been flirting that you like me too, no?"  
Damn he really didn't beat around the bush.  
"Uh- y-yea…yes, Jongho." Mingi croaked out practically paralyzed with fear.  
"Do you want to cuddle, then?" Jongho smiled at him softly.  
Mingi nodded, and he should've been surprised when Jongho pulled him in close to be the little spoon but it just felt right. Of course, Mingi was taller by a good amount but he just felt so safe in Jongho's hold. Nestled in those strong arms like he was meant to be there. He relaxed his head against the younger's chest, zeroing in on the loud but steady beat of his heart.  
So right. 

\-------

Mingi sighed as he settled into the couch for the group's weekly movie night. He was first to sit, mixed drink (white rum and fruit punch) in hand as he adjusted comfortably into the armrest on the left side of the sofa. He took another deep breath, wholly prepared for relaxation after a long day when the younger, smaller boy sat next to him.  
"Mingi hyung," he said, almost congratulatory, raising his cup. Mingi reached his own cup towards Jongho's, trying to ignore the fact that their thighs were entirely pressed against one another. Which was unnecessary, given the remaining space on the furniture. Not to mention they had no real reason to celebrate.  
"Jongho-yah." Mingi said stoutly and almost void of emotion while they clanged their plastic cups together.  
Jongho didn't say much else aside from a few words to the other members as they took their own seats. They hadn't really spoken about the cuddling situation since it happened.  
Mingi audibly sighed, wondering why his body's response to the maknae was so immediate. He was only sitting next to him, yet his heart found its way into his throat as they watched The Incredibles as a group for at least the tenth time.  
It might have been the fact that the younger took Mingi's hand in his after the first few minutes. Might have been the fact that when he saw Mingi eye-balling the popcorn, he'd taken it upon himself to feed him pieces for a while, one by one. Might have been the fact that Jongho lifted his leg to rest it over his thighs. Might have been the fact that Jongho looked up at him, deep brown eyes full of stars and lips oh so inviting. Whatever it was, Mingi felt like he was flying. 

Jongho leaned in close to whisper in his ear "Let's go to bed, hyung."  
Mingi involuntarily shivered, doing his best to neglect the way those specific words made heat churn his gut.  
"Uh, s-sure." Mingi choked out as he stood abruptly, leaving Jongho on the couch. "I'm off to bed, guys." He said casually in contrast to his quick movements. Everyone figured he was tired and brushed it off. At least until Jongho chimed in, rising and following him to their shared room. 

Mingi laid on his bottom bunk, almost praying that Jongho was actually tired and wondering why he had requested he go to bed. He wondered why the shorter boy agreed so easily, wordlessly retreating to their room without so much as a second thought.  
Except now he found himself conflicted, mind racing through a thousand scenarios and hands linked on his stomach as he stared at the bunk above him.  
The door opened and closed with a quiet sound.  
"Hyung?" Jongho ducked under the bunk, brows pinched in worry the second he saw Mingi. Hesitancy barely flashed through Mingi's mind before he pulled Jongho by the forearm, the other coming to land practically on top of him. Jongho scrambled to get his hands beneath himself, Mingi meeting his gaze. "You know I-"  
"I love you, Song Mingi." Jongho interrupted, placing a soft kiss to Mingi's lips. Mingi's world flipped on its axis. He was partially glad the younger had admitted his feelings first, and partially kicking himself for not being the one to admit it. He was a terrified mess of a man, glancing up at Jongho. Until the younger placed another kiss on his lips. So deliciously mint mojito flavored. "Jongho-yah. I.. I love you too." He breathed out. "So, so much."  
"Please, Mingi, just call me Jongho." The younger laughed against his lips, eyes never leaving his.  
"Okay, Jongho." He kissed him again, full of longing. It was returned equally, the maknae letting his body come to rest against Mingi's before he broke the kiss once more.  
"Just don't tell Hongjoong hyung."


End file.
